


In Space . . .

by dettiot



Category: The Martian - All Media Types
Genre: F/M, Fluff and Angst, I can't write anything without some angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-20
Updated: 2019-06-20
Packaged: 2020-05-15 02:16:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,486
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19286071
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dettiot/pseuds/dettiot
Summary: In the days before the Hermes meets up with the resupply probe, two members of its crew find a hidden moment together.





	In Space . . .

**Author's Note:**

> Written for the prompt “distracting with affection” on my Fluff Bingo card.

Calling the crew rooms on the _Hermes_ ‘cabins’ was a wildly enthusiastic description of the actual reality. There was enough gravity in this section of the _Hermes_ that no one had to strap themselves into a sleeping bag attached to the wall; everyone had an actual, although narrow, bed in their room. Although even with the centripetal gravity being disengaged, it didn’t really matter much. Other than the bed, there was a desk, built into the wall above the foot of your bed, where you could dock your personal laptop, enough space to post a few personal photos on the bulkheads, and . . . that was it. 

Commander Lewis had a window, but Beck and the rest of the crew didn’t have that luxury. So with the overhead lights off, his cabin was pitch black. It was maybe the perfect setting to watch _Alien_. Because space. 

Stretched out on his bunk, an arm tucked behind his head, Beck watched the movie without really paying much attention to it. He had seen this movie at least a dozen times. Before he had gone to Mars, it was one of his favorites. 

Now, though, he didn’t like what it was making him think about. Not with everything going on, not with their rendezvous with the resupply probe happening tomorrow. With a quiet grunt, he sat up and moved to shut off his laptop when there was a light tap against his closed door. 

He paused the movie, wondering who it was. Not Lewis or Martinez; they were both early to bed, early to rise types. Vogel kept to himself during his off-hours. The most likely person would have been Watney, if he was here. 

Beck’s stomach twisted and he reached out to open the door, wondering why he felt surprised when he saw Johanssen floating in the corridor. Because who else could it be but her? But that didn’t mean he wasn’t still surprised, because . . . 

And he was just standing there without saying anything. Giving himself a mental shake, he nodded to her, taking in her pale skin and dark eyes. “Hey, Johanssen.” 

She nodded back. “Hey, Chris.” 

He blinked at his first name. “Oh. Um, hi, Beth.” 

It felt as weird to say her name as it was to hear his own. He could see her acknowledge the weirdness with a quirk of her lips. 

“What are you watching?” she asked, gesturing to his laptop. 

He actually had to glance back at the screen to remind himself. There was something about her, something that made him feel slow and not himself--in a good way. He liked her a lot; had liked her from the start of their training. But even before Lewis had sat all the men down and told them what she would do to them if they hit on Johanssen, Beck knew he would say nothing about how he felt until they got back to Earth.

_dude . . . you need to tell Johanssen how you feel._

“ _Alien_ ,” he said, ignoring his mental Watney throwing spitballs at him for not manning up. 

“Really?” she asked, her eyebrows raising slightly. “I wouldn’t have guessed that.” 

Not really sure what to say, Beck just shrugged his shoulders and gave her an attempt at a smile. “Wasn’t really ready to sleep.” 

“Watching that, you’re not going to want to sleep. At least, watching it alone, you won’t be able to sleep.” Johanssen hesitated, then reached out with both hands, one gripping the side of the doorframe and the other gently pushing him aside, so she could pull herself into his cabin. 

One person made the cabin feel small. Two made it feel so confined, Beck nearly moved out into the corridor, based on some lizard-like part of his brain that did not want to be so close to Johanssen. 

Beth. Maybe calling her Beth in his head would make this easier? 

She sat down on the end of his bed, crossing her legs. The only light came from the corridor and he could see her squinting before she said, “Close the door.” 

Was she trying to kill him? Did she not realize he was not only trying to follow orders, but be a gentleman, also? But there wasn’t anything else he could do but grant her request, so Beck--for fuck’s sake, in his own head, he really should call himself Chris--closed the door but immediately turned on the small reading light at the head of his bed, before sitting down in a similar position to Beth’s. 

Both their backs were against the bulkhead that ran along his bed, their shoulders nearly touching. He rested his feet against the edge of the bed, his knees in the air, his arms folded over his chest. 

“Can’t sleep, either?” he asked her quietly, not ready to sit in a dim room with her in silence. 

“No,” she said. Her hands--doctor’s hands, he had always thought, what with her slender fingers and small fists--were clasped together in her lap. “Thinking about what Commander Lewis told me. About what would happen if something goes wrong with the rendezvous.” 

“Oh,” he said, feeling his heart drop down to somewhere around his stomach. “The . . . the worst-case scenario option?” 

She nodded and then tugged on the holder in her hair, releasing her ponytail. With her brown hair falling around her face, Beth immediately looked softer and younger. “Yeah.” 

Chris swallowed, trying to get rid of the bitter taste in his mouth. “You know it’s just in case. And that . . . that you’re the only person who’d be able to get the _Hermes_ back to Earth by yourself. And--” 

When Beth interrupted him by putting her small, soft fingers over his mouth, Chris immediately stopped talking. Now his heart was in his throat, and even if he wasn’t a doctor, he’d know that was impossible, but it was how he felt. 

“Commander Lewis told me how she chose me. How she asked you first, if I was the best choice from a medical perspective,” Beth said. “And how you reacted.” 

There was just enough light for him to see her face, to see how large and dark her eyes were. She dropped her hand from his mouth and he took a deep breath. “I yelled at her,” he said. 

Which was another understatement, like calling this room a cabin. He had blown his top at Lewis, and he was lucky she hadn’t filed insubordination charges against him in his official record. But asking him if Johanssen would be okay, watching the rest of the crew kill themselves in order to save all the supplies for her, and then for her to _eat them_ in order to survive, once the supplies ran out . . . 

Well, he hadn’t responded like a doctor in that moment. He had said some things he really hoped Lewis wouldn’t think about. 

Unable to help himself, Chris reached out and took Beth’s hand. “I said that medically, it was possible. But that I didn’t think it was a good idea. That . . . that it wasn’t fair to you.” 

“Fair to me?” she asked, her fingers lightly pressing against his for a moment. “What about you?” 

“Well, yeah, it wouldn’t be fair to the rest of us. You know, the whole dying as heroes thing, not getting to enjoy the parades and honors . . . ” Chris said, trying to sound like he was joking. Mark could have pulled it off, but not him. He didn’t have a sense of humor, as Mark had liked to point out. 

“No, Chris--fair to _you_ ,” Beth said, emphasizing the last word.

Oh. Wait. Was she . . . ?

Beth suddenly blew out a breath and gave her hair a shake. “I don’t want to think about this. I mean, not for tonight. That’s why I came here.” 

Chris nodded dumbly. “Yeah . . . yeah, I don’t want to think about it either.” 

“Okay,” she said. “Then . . . movie?” 

“Um, sure,” he said, shifting around and trying to reach his laptop without letting go of her hand. Which he was still holding, and damned if he wasn’t going to keep holding her hand for as long as he could. 

“I’ve got it,” she said, gracefully going up on her knees to restart the movie. Then she settled back onto the bed, but now closer to him than before. In fact, she was leaning back against his side, almost stretching out on the bed.

Blinking, Chris stared at the laptop screen, trying to take in this turn of events. And then Beth sat up and pushed at his shoulder. “Move up against the other bulkhead.” 

He couldn’t help smiling a little. “God, you’re bossy. How did I not know that you’re bossy?” 

She smiled back. “No, I just want to be comfortable.” 

“And me moving here will make you comfortable?” he asked, moving to sit with his back against the bulkhead at the head of his bed, his legs out straight. 

“This way,” she said, crawling up the bed and mirroring his position. But because the bed was so narrow, she had to press against his side, from shoulders to toes.

Chris scooted over towards the bulkhead, but Beth just moved with him. He looked down at her, unable to see her face in shadow due to the reading light shining in his eyes. He stretched his arm over her and reached the switch, flicking it off. 

“See? Comfortable,” she said, her words holding a trace of suppressed laughter. 

“Mmm,” he murmured in agreement, his eyes beginning to adjust so he could see her face. So he could see how she was smiling up at him. 

It wasn’t often that Beth smiled. She was so serious, so private. He had known her for three years and yet, he didn’t feel like he knew her at all. But he trusted her with his life, and felt like she felt the same way. 

He had told himself there would be time after the mission to get to know the real Beth Johanssen. But now that their mission would, hopefully, be five hundred days longer . . . he wasn’t sure if he could wait until the end of the mission. 

“So . . . have you seen _Alien_ before?” he asked, wanting to start asking questions about her that wouldn’t seem out of left field.

Beth nodded. “I went to the fiftieth anniversary retrospective. Where they showed all the films, leading up to _Alien_ , but I only watched that and _Aliens_ , since they’re the only good ones.” 

“Um, wrong, _Alien 3_ and _Alien: Resurrection_ are good, too. I mean, they have Sigourney Weaver in them, so even though they’re not as good, they’re still . . .” 

He had to stop talking, because Beth was shaking her head so vigorously, he was worried she would crack a neck vertebra. “You are so incredibly wrong,” she said. “Not even Sigourney Weaver could save those.” 

“Jeez, everyone’s a critic,” he said mock-grumpily, grinning when Beth laughed. 

“Someone’s sensitive,” she teased, draping her arm over his waist and rubbing his back. “Don’t worry, I won’t hold your awful taste in movies against you.” 

“It’s not my fault I’m a completist,” he argued playfully, enjoying the feel of her hand on his back way too much. “If I start something, I have to finish it.” 

“Which means you’re a glutton for punishment. Good to know.” 

Chris swallowed and leaned closer to her. “It sounds like you’re saving up a lot of info about me.” 

Her hand paused in its movements, resting against the middle of his back. “Well, yeah,” Beth said.

“Why?” 

“Because I want to know,” she said simply. 

There were no lights on, and barely any light coming from the laptop screen, but Chris felt like the sun was coming up. “Why?” he asked again, grinning at her. 

Beth made a little noise of annoyance, but her smile didn’t go away. “The ego on you.”

“I’m a doctor and an astronaut,” he argued, grinning wider. “I think my ego is justified.” 

Further inflating his ego, she actually let out a small giggle, a noise he would have never thought he’d hear from serious computer engineer Beth Johanssen. 

“I want to know about you, too,” he said, slowly draping an arm over her waist, mimicking her position. “I have from the beginning. I just . . .”

“Held back because of Commander Lewis’s order: no hitting on Johanssen?” 

He blinked. “How do you know about that?” 

“Mark told me,” Beth said, her fingers lightly stroking his spine. “I’m glad he did. It explained some stuff.” 

Nodding, Chris looked at her face. He had spent so much time searching her expressions, looking for clues into who she was. Now that she was looking back at him, so soft and open, it didn’t feel much easier. But it also didn’t feel like his only option. 

“Like what?” he asked, letting his forehead rest against hers.

Her gaze flicked over his face, before she met his eyes. “Why you hadn’t made a move.” 

“I didn’t want to make things awkward,” he said. 

“Me, neither. And then we made it awkward anyway,” she said with a little smile. 

Quirking his lips, he nodded. “Y’know what Mark told me? To tell you how I felt. But to wait until the end of the mission to do it.” 

“Whoops.” 

Chris laughed. “Yeah, whoops.” 

With that, neither of them seemed to need to talk more. For a few endless moments, they looked at each other, their hands stroking muscles but not straying from their backs. The movie reached its climax and ended, the laptop’s screen going black. 

With the room now in near-complete darkness and Beth only a shadowy form in front of him, Chris still spoke softly. “We’ll need to keep this secret.” 

“I know,” she said. “But . . . I’m pretty sure Martinez already thinks something has happened. And Vogel doesn’t care about that.” 

“Lewis would care,” he said.

“Yeah,” Beth said with a sigh.

Before the silence got too heavy, he said quickly, “As much as I respect Lewis . . . you matter more to me.” 

Beth’s hand shifted on his back, and he braced himself for her to pull away, to put distance between them, to leave the room and him. But instead, she slowly dragged her hand up his side and to his jaw. “You matter more to me, too.” 

He smiled slowly, even though he doubted she could see him. “Yeah?” 

Her thumb stroked over his cheek. “Yeah.”

Chris shifted closer to her, tilting his head. “You should know, I’m already re-evaluating my position on the other _Alien_ movies.” 

He could feel, more than hear, her huff of laughter. “That’s good. Because otherwise, I'd have to make you reconsider. And you know what they say.” 

“Huh?” 

“In space, no one can hear you scream,” she said, each word a little puff of air against his lips. 

“Ah. Yeah . . . let’s find out if that's true,” he said, right before he kissed her. 

End.


End file.
